Daily routine of an employee in the IT Department

Mo,
08:05
The Week is starting quiet good. The guys from PR called, they can’t find a file. Told them to use the Desktop search tool “fdisk”.
Think they’ll be busy for a while.

08:25
The accounting department is complaining about the network connection. Ensured them to take care of it immediately. Plugged in my coffee machine and their server again. Why is no one listening when I say I don’t have enough sockets here?
Accounting department thanks fort the quick support. Once again some happy users!

08:45
Those morons from the warehouse want to know how they can change the fonts in their word processing. I ask them which chipset is installed on their Motherboard. They want to call back when they have found out…

09:20
Call from a branch: They can’t open any files in Lotus Notes.
Put them through to the janitor.

09:35
PR again. Say the workstation won’t boot, displaying the error message: Error in drive 0.
Tell them it’s an OS bug and give them the number of the Microsoft hotline.

09:40
The warehousemen seem to have found out that the chipset has got nothing to do with any fonts. I tell them I said Bit set instead of chipset to keep them searching.
Wonder how they were able to get a drivers license!

10:05
Training officer calls, needs a new access code for a student. Tell him to fill out form
7A96GFTR4567LPHT. Says he never heard of anything like that.
Put him through to the janitor.

10:20
Those guys from the warehouse just won’t quit. They’re very unfriendly and claim I’d bullshit them. Say they found out how to change the fonts on their own. They want to complain about me at the personnel manager. Set the personnel manager’s line to “busy”.
After that, I log on to their server and teach them a lesson.

10:30
My girlfriend calls. Her parents want to visit her on the weekend and she prepared a comprehensive supervision program. Just won’t stop talking. Put her through to the janitor.

10:40
Warehouse again. Report meekly all their files are empty. I tell them this is what happens to people thinking they’re smarter than the Administrator. I try hard to act forgiving and promise to start solving the problem as soon as I can. After 15 minutes of drinking coffee I switch back the font colour from white to black on their server. They are gushingly thankful and assure me the threatened complain was just a joke. I’m sure they’ll be my fans from now on!

10:45
Janitor comes and tells me about some strange calls he received today. He desperately wants to learn something about computers. I tell him we start education right now. His first lesson is to have an eye on the monitor. I leave for lunch.

14:30
Back from lunch. The janitor tells me that the personnel manager was here because of some problems with his telephone. Toggle his line back to “ready”. What would these people only do without me?

14:35
Plug the hotline phone back in, rings immediately. Sandra (seems to be newly employed) says she needs a new ID real urgent, because she forgot the old one. Tell her I need her hair colour, age, vital statistics and martial status to feed the randomizer (generating the IDs) with. Her answers sound exiting. I tell her the data will be processed until the afternoon, but because of the urgency I’d personally give her the new ID.

14:40
While browsing the personal managers appointment calendar I delete the „TOMORROW WEDDING DAY!!!” entry on Wednesday and “WEDDING DAY – GET FLOWERS ON WAY HOME!!!” Thursdays.
I wonder if he’ll still look so satisfied on Friday…

14:45
The janitor thinks something might be wrong with the monitor; it seems to be too dark. I turn it on and start the screensaver. He keenly starts to take notes. If only the whole staff would be that easy to satisfy!

14:55
Put some files from the “solved problems” folder back on the main server to make sure that the displacement for the nightshift won’t be too bored.

15:00
Leisure time at last! Just got Sandra’s address from the personnel department’s server and grabbed the champagne bottle from the manager’s fridge. I quickly take a note with her new ID (123456) before I get on my way to her home.
After such a hard day a man needs a bit relaxing!